BONUS: (c)Lit's MonsterErotica Con Guide

A little over a month ago, JC and I were in Baltimore for the second MonsterErotica Book Con, and we had some big learnings. The epics highs and lowest of our con prep are all laid out bare along with some Baltimore city suggestions and general love for all of Chloe's monster lovers in arms.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:04

What's up everybody? It's Chloe. It's not. It's a lie. It's Chloe. My name is Chloe. Uh I uh I'm so mean to my husband. What? No, I'm not. No, you're not.

SPEAKER_04 0:17

You're really nice. You're really nice, and you put up with a lot.

SPEAKER_01 0:21

This is clitoris. I put up with so much from my bitch husband JC.

SPEAKER_04 0:27

Not a bitch, just like uh a rage baiter.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

A rage baiter. My husband JC is not a rage baiter.

SPEAKER_04 0:34

JC's a rage baiter. Uh anyway, uh and this is clitoris. This is clitoris. This is a clitor bonus episode, though.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

So it's on that bonus shit.

SPEAKER_04 0:43

It's on that bonus shit. It's coming out at a random. Girl, stop interrupting me. Uh it's coming out at a random time, uh, because as you might have seen uh on my sweet, sweet Insta, with I think we're up to 14 followers now, um, we were at Monster Erotica BookCon past weekend, so I was not able to uh edit the episode and be the the girl boss of the pod.

SPEAKER_01 1:10

Yeah, Jay uh JC can't be and JC can't be a girl boss.

SPEAKER_04 1:13

JC cannot be a girl boss.

SPEAKER_01 1:15

No. I have to I have to specify now that I'm actually JC, just in case this is the first episode you've ever heard in life.

SPEAKER_04 1:22

Oh my god. Okay, so we were at Monster Erotica.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

Yeah, we were.

SPEAKER_04 1:27

It was a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_01 1:28

In Baltimore, baby.

SPEAKER_04 1:29

In Baltimore, baby. Uh it was the second year of the con overall. I was there as a volunteer. JC, you were there as an actual attendee because I I pay to get my bitches into shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

That's right. I was there as a non-VIP.

SPEAKER_04 1:40

Yeah, JC was there uh because uh a good friend of the pod, uh Jack was not able to attend, and JC said, Well, what if I went with you and I said?

SPEAKER_01 1:48

I'll just take the ticket.

SPEAKER_04 1:49

What if you did? And I made JC read a handful of Monster Erotica books. Yeah. Uh he liked them.

SPEAKER_01 1:57

I did. I read um The Gardener and the Water Horse by Mallory Dunlan.

SPEAKER_04 2:01

Yep, that's correct. That's one.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

I read uh Ensnared by Tiffany Roberts.

SPEAKER_04 2:05

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Um I read Romanced by the Rat by GM Fairy. Uh I read On the Cairn Keeping of Orcs by Cassishire. And I can never remember the name or author of it's uh it's about scarecrows.

SPEAKER_04 2:24

Oh, uh The Scarecrow's Queen by Naomi Lucas.

SPEAKER_01 2:27

Yes, yes, yes, by Naomi Lucas.

SPEAKER_04 2:29

Yeah. So did we meet her?

SPEAKER_01 2:31

I guess uh spoilers, did we meet her?

SPEAKER_04 2:33

I did, you didn't.

SPEAKER_01 2:34

I did not.

SPEAKER_04 2:35

You did not, I did. You just you were busy doing your own thing.

SPEAKER_01 2:38

I was eating crab cakes.

SPEAKER_04 2:39

Jeez, he was eating crab cakes. I went there because obviously I'm a romance uh girly. I'm a monster romance girly. That's what I like to talk about on the pod, that's what I care about. Um, and it was my first con ever. Despite working in events, I don't go to them because I find when I go to events, especially larger ones like this, uh, if I'm not given a job, I'll just give myself one.

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Oh, yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_04 3:02

Yeah, I'll just start like acting as a help desk.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Well, yeah, well, I mean, kind of similar to the way we do vacation, where I I tend to plan like a bulk the bulk of them so you don't have to. Um, I kind of imagine that if someone were like, hey, do you want to go watch someone else do data analysis in a social work setting? I would be like, God no. Jesus Christ, hell no, I don't want that.

SPEAKER_04 3:25

It's not even that, but we talked about it. Like, it's hard to know what the background details are.

SPEAKER_01 3:29

Yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_04 3:30

Um, and not be able to to assist or help or or not be like, hey, please, please let me step in. Uh I was fairly good at controlling myself as a volunteer and not uh overstepping my boundaries. Good for me. Pat on the back.

SPEAKER_01 3:42

Pat on the back for you.

SPEAKER_04 3:43

Uh event professional uh respecting other people's boundaries. Good for her. Very rare to see. But it was a great time. Uh we were there. I was there early. I was there for pre-day and helped out. I did make trades. JC did not know there were trades, but he did get traded.

SPEAKER_01 3:58

I got traded and I also traded your stuff while you were volunteering.

SPEAKER_04 4:01

Yeah, you acted as my um Yeah, I was Chloe for a while. You were Chloe for a while and you were you were out there sluting my penises.

SPEAKER_01 4:08

Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

SPEAKER_04 4:10

Because I had little squishy peans.

SPEAKER_01 4:11

Yeah, if you got a penis and there was like a a dead pan man handing them to you who looked visibly tired. That was me. Uh, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry you didn't get to deal with Chloe.

SPEAKER_04 4:23

It was great. There was panels. Uh I have not told JC how much I spent on pre-orders and I never will. That's fine. Um, but I I think I want to talk about in this episode uh thoughts, feelings, recommendations uh for attendees. Oh, sure. For people going who are like, I've never been before, or like what you wish you knew going into it. Oh, sure. That seems fun. Yeah, so it'll just be something a little different. Um, so obviously, being an event freak, I knew about this and I learned about Monster Erotica Con literally the day after the first event ended because I was busy in Seattle getting my absolute ass handed to me by changing event policies. So I was run down and pissed off, and I saw that Monster Erotica happened in Baltimore, and I was like, why could I have not have been there instead of other stupid work thing?

SPEAKER_01 5:12

How come I'm not in Baltimore right now?

SPEAKER_04 5:14

How come I'm not in B more? Um, so I had been planning to attend Monster Erotica for a year. It had been something I was aware of, it was something I knew I wanted to help with. Um because work is a soul-sucking bitch, I have been very aggressive in like reaching out to people who run shops or organizations and being like, hey, can I do anything free admin work, free anything? Please, for the love of God, let me be excited about something I'm doing. Um, and so I reached out to Cassie, who manages it and was like, please, for the love of God, let me help. And she was like, girl, just sign up to volunteer. Um, so I did that. And so I have been planning on this for a very long time. Now that it's over, it's it's con crash time, you know. You don't feel that because you weren't like riling yourself up for this.

SPEAKER_01 6:08

I was not no.

SPEAKER_04 6:09

But there's definitely kind of like a a what do you do if the thing you've been looking forward to for a year is like done. For sure. Um, so that's hard. Um, but I think it's it's really fun, and I think uh there are a handful of ways to engage in this event, and you and I handled it very differently.

SPEAKER_01 6:25

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 6:25

Um so I'll just I'll I'll go into that. So yeah, Chloe.

SPEAKER_01 6:29

Chloe.

SPEAKER_04 6:30

Me, not you.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 6:32

Thank you. Uh um we are Chloe and we collectively are Chloe. We, as the people. J-Loe. Jelowe?

SPEAKER_01 6:42

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 6:43

That's a bad couple name.

SPEAKER_01 6:44

Chloe.

SPEAKER_04 6:45

Better. That's better than Jelloe. Yeah. Uh so the the Lowe part of Jelowe. Uh, so like I said, I was aware of this for a year. I was in the Discord from the very beginning and I was very active in the Discord. Um, I think you can attend this event without being in the Discord. Like you don't need to, but it makes it fun. I did. Yeah, you did. It makes it fun to like recognize people and you can talk about trades and you can participate in the reading challenge. You did not do that.

SPEAKER_01 7:12

Um, I didn't know they had the reading challenge.

SPEAKER_04 7:14

Yeah, there was a reading challenge.

SPEAKER_01 7:15

Oh, is this the re this is the reading challenges you were doing? Yeah. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 7:18

The reading challenges where you try to read a book from every author uh that attended.

SPEAKER_01 7:22

Oh, okay. Did you do that?

SPEAKER_04 7:25

I got to 33%.

SPEAKER_01 7:26

33? 33! I know, I know! How many authors were there?

SPEAKER_04 7:32

Uh fifty or sixty something.

SPEAKER_01 7:36

Sure.

SPEAKER_04 7:36

Yeah, I didn't I didn't complete like I wanted to.

SPEAKER_01 7:39

Well, I I imagine at least some of that, because you mentioned there was like some in and out on um certain uh authors not being able to attend kind of last minute.

SPEAKER_04 7:48

There was three that dropped overall, uh which is the first time. No, it's not like a remarkable amount, but it's what I'm saying is if you are interested in attending Monster Erotica Con and if you have time, like don't be afraid to be like a freak about it and like get involved and be excited, because like everyone there is gonna be a freak with you. Uh it is a lot of wonderfully neurodivergent, cringe embracing people who have no shame in what they love and want to share with you what they love, and that's a great thing to be a part of. Um, so my first recommendation would definitely be uh like don't be afraid to engage in the community. Like, even if you're not a hundred percent sure like if that's something you want to, like, it's just fun to be there and like you can post pictures of what you've been making for cons or ask questions or talk about travel, or there was even a channel for like things you want to do in Baltimore if you've never been before.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

Oh, was there?

SPEAKER_04 8:47

Yeah, there was you wouldn't know, he weren't gonna be.

SPEAKER_01 8:49

I wouldn't know. What did they have in there?

SPEAKER_04 8:51

People talked about food places and museums, festivals happening at the time.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04 8:55

Uh the best way to get around the city.

SPEAKER_01 8:57

Bus.

SPEAKER_04 8:59

Bus. Um I I think it was great to have those. Um, and it was it was fun to see what everyone was doing. And it also makes it easier when you go on site on site, like it's work. Uh when you go to the con. Um, because you recognize people. Uh you might not recognize their face, but they'll have like on their name, like I'm Ashley, and I'm Ashley. Book bitch or whatever. And you're like, Book bitch! I'm not book bitch! Like, it's so good to see you. Um, so that was a lot of fun. I would really encourage someone to to engage in the community in in all parts.

SPEAKER_01 9:34

Uh I d I did find it uh delightfully earnest as somebody who um has kind of a hard time uh displaying earnest emotions. Um I did find the uh very earnest way people enjoyed things at the at the con uh very fun. Um and um I don't know, I just kind of appreciated that uh that aspect of it.

SPEAKER_04 10:00

Don't be don't be afraid to be cringe. Um I one thing I really regret, I will be honest with you, is I was so afraid of looking like the world's biggest dildo. I didn't have the confidence within me to go be more social.

SPEAKER_01 10:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:18

I think that was a big regret. I recognized a handful of people, not only that I follow and like talk to on the the thing, but like there were artists that I was fucking obsessed with that were there as attendees.

SPEAKER_01 10:31

Oh, that's funny.

SPEAKER_04 10:32

And I was like, oh my I can't I didn't tell you because you wouldn't have known who the fuck they were, but I was like, I was like, oh my god. Oh my god. I have like $300 worth of this bitch's prints and stickers that she has drawn in her like my Etsy cart right now. But like I didn't want to say anything because like that's weird. But it's not, it's just me kind of being like too self-conscious, and I think that was my big regret of the year is like letting that get to me. Cause I think when you're on site, and I know we've talked about this, is like everyone there is just like, like you said, they're kind of like enthusiastically earnest.

SPEAKER_01 11:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 11:03

And so, like, if I were to put on my big girl panties and run up and tell these artists, oh my god, bitch, I'm obsessed with your shit, you're so talented. I think I would have felt less like a weirdo, like a weird outsider than I let myself. I think I'm very disappointed in myself for being a shy hoe.

SPEAKER_01 11:23

Yeah, this is kind of the setting for that, I think.

SPEAKER_04 11:25

I know, I know, I know.

SPEAKER_01 11:27

I think if you saw them like in the out in these streets and you like accosted them, they might feel a little more uncomfortable about that. But this is where they come to get accosted in the out in these streets.

SPEAKER_04 11:39

I know, and I'm really disappointed in myself for for not doing more. Um so my next, yeah, my recommendation other than engage in the community is like don't don't be afraid to like run up on bitches. Run up on the bitches. Well, I mean don't run Grab them. No, don't do that. Um like don't grab them.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

Grab grab at them. Um You gimme hands at them. Yeah, shout, shout in their face, uh, get on your knees, do uppies. Um Grab the front of their shirt and their face and hair. Um say, I'm gonna get you.

SPEAKER_04 12:11

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 12:14

Uh yeah, grab 'em.

SPEAKER_04 12:15

No grab 'em.

SPEAKER_01 12:16

Grab them, yell in their face.

SPEAKER_04 12:17

No, but be like, it's okay to go up and say hi to Don't do that one. Don't kiss them. It's okay to go up Oh my god. It's okay to go up and like say hi to people and like get excited about meeting them. Um, especially if you engage in the the community, uh everyone shares their socials, and like if you have a bookstagram, the Monster Erotica sentient object romance community is only so big.

SPEAKER_01 12:40

For sure.

SPEAKER_04 12:41

So you'll end up seeing a lot of the same people.

SPEAKER_01 12:44

You'll be like, we've beefed on Instagram.

SPEAKER_04 12:46

You don't beef. No one beefs.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

No one beefs on Instagram? Hmm? No one no one beefs on Monster Erotica? No! Not unless you're using AI. Surely you gotta be like, nah, d doors, it's where it's at. Fuck lamps.

SPEAKER_04 13:01

Nah. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. I think the door and lamp books are actually by the same author.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Anyway, I didn't know there's a distinction. I made that up.

SPEAKER_04 13:09

I know you did. Um, so yeah, don't be afraid to engage in it. Oh, uh, uh, if you can stay at the hotel that the event's at.

SPEAKER_01 13:17

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That definitely made things easy and convenient.

SPEAKER_04 13:20

Because if you're like me and you spend way too much money on um uh pre-orders, you're running that card up to your room.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

What do you mean you're running that card up to your room?

SPEAKER_04 13:28

Your emotional support husband is running that card up to your room. Also, also also, I'm gonna be dead ass with you. I did not originally plan on having a cart.

SPEAKER_01 13:37

I was just gonna carry you're gonna carry it in your hands?

SPEAKER_04 13:40

I was gonna carry it in my hands or like use like a little shoulder bag.

SPEAKER_01 13:44

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_04 13:44

No, you need the cart. If you have any pre-orders, if you're picking up more than like three books at a time, if you're ordering more than three books, get the cart.

SPEAKER_01 13:51

Oh, yeah, for sure. That uh that that's rule number three, bring a cart.

SPEAKER_04 13:55

Rule recommendation number three, get a cart. It doesn't have to be a fancy one, it doesn't have to be able to hold 90 pounds, you don't need to be able to sit on it. Uh you do need some to hold the books. Cause because I my cart is from, I don't remember what company it's from. Vivor?

SPEAKER_02 14:11

Sure.

SPEAKER_04 14:11

Whatever. Uh I could hold I got 11 books from my my my girl Lizzie Strong, and I that immediately tapped me out.

SPEAKER_01 14:22

I was immediately like, my cart was full. Yeah, look, rule number one is you gotta have fun, and rule number two is bring a cart.

SPEAKER_04 14:29

Actually, we're on rule number three. But yeah, recommendation.

SPEAKER_01 14:31

And rule number three is also you bring a cart too. Two and three is have cart. Um, rule number one is you gotta have fun, and this is how to be a heartbreaker.

SPEAKER_04 14:39

Look at you. Good for you, King.

SPEAKER_01 14:42

I know, I know one lyric.

SPEAKER_04 14:44

It's a Marina and the Diamonds song.

SPEAKER_01 14:46

Is it?

SPEAKER_04 14:47

Yeah, sure. Yeah, look at him.

SPEAKER_01 14:49

I don't know them. I only know rule number one is you gotta have fun. This is how to be a heartbreaker.

SPEAKER_04 14:56

Oh my god. Uh, so okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

Keep that. Keep that in.

SPEAKER_04 15:00

Okay, recap. Engage with the community.

SPEAKER_01 15:02

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 15:03

Don't be afraid to look silly.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

Don't be afraid to look silly. Three, bring your cart. Bring your cart, bring your cart, bring your um partner, spouse, husband, wife.

SPEAKER_04 15:12

If you can.

SPEAKER_01 15:12

The them spend.

SPEAKER_04 15:14

Them spend.

SPEAKER_01 15:15

Wife.

SPEAKER_04 15:15

Um, another thing I'd really like to uh share is so Monster Erotica and a lot of cons. I'm also going to Nestfest later this year. Shout out my Nestfest girlies.

SPEAKER_02 15:25

Oh, sure.

SPEAKER_04 15:26

Uh they do trades.

SPEAKER_02 15:28

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 15:28

Um They're trade. They they they are trade. Um they do trades. Trades are just kind of like a way, I think, especially in in cons and you're all excited about something to break the ice.

SPEAKER_01 15:39

Um That's definitely that was definitely the vibe I think.

SPEAKER_04 15:41

It it gives you a reason to go up and be like, I have something. Do you do you have something you want to trade? Um, I think first and foremost, that's great. Love it. So much fun. Uh if you're if you're doing it, I would encourage you to do trades if you can. Uh, but I would also encourage you, like, don't stress over it.

SPEAKER_01 15:56

I was I was about to say the same thing when I was holding um your your handmade uh or your painted penises.

SPEAKER_04 16:02

My painted penises.

SPEAKER_01 16:03

Uh there were a number of people who approached me and um or were with somebody else who had something to trade, but they themselves did not. And when I offered their the they I think they took a very literal uh interpretation of the term trade that it's like a literally a quid pro quo. Uh that was not, at least for me, I think if you're like, hey, can I get that? And someone's like, no, it has to be a literal trade, uh, fight that person in the con. Don't fight the person Grab them, grab them, get on your knees, do uppies, and kiss them.

SPEAKER_04 16:36

Uh and then hit them.

SPEAKER_01 16:37

It's a great punch them.

SPEAKER_04 16:39

It's a great way to do icebreakers. I think I I personally I agree with you. When people are like, I don't have anything to trade, I'm like, girl, I don't care. Take as many as you would like. Like if you have a friend who would love a Frankenstein penis, like, go for it. Like, I made these because they were fun for me to make and because it's a good way to meet people and to force me to not be like a weird little freak. Um, so I would encourage that. I had people who traded stickers, there was uh one woman who traded knitted alien heads, incredible, yeah, a lot of crocheted squids, uh ribbons are a really common one, but like it doesn't have to be anything. I have some of my favorite trades. I mean, there were so many, but one I really love was uh someone made like these little business card-sized prints that they painted that was just like with a sharpie and like watercolor, and I love them. I put them in my little print book, they were so much fun. Uh, you don't need to have enough for everyone at the con. I brought 121 penises for a convention of 500 people. Um, and that's okay. Like it's not about gifting something, it's just it's a really good way if you're like me and you're a weird freak and you don't want to approach people. It gives a reason for people to approach me, which uh I've been like that ever since I was a child where I don't want to bother people, I want them to bother me. So great reason for that. So uh four, recommend doing trades if you can. JC, I've been talking a lot. Do you have any thoughts that you would like to add?

SPEAKER_01 18:06

Oh, is it my turn? Um, bitch! Yeah, I guess I can talk. I will allow you to talk as your keeper. Um I mean I had a great time. I was kind of in and out.

SPEAKER_04 18:20

Um JC wasn't as committed to it as I was.

SPEAKER_01 18:23

Uh I I mean, yeah, for sure. Um I wouldn't say I like didn't I wasn't committed or I didn't have fun, but I was I was definitely um in and out. I um they didn't provide lunch, so I did uh run out for lunch each day.

SPEAKER_04 18:37

Uh very important to note though, JC only travels for food.

SPEAKER_01 18:40

So like Well that's yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_04 18:43

Very important.

SPEAKER_01 18:43

I'm I'm primarily traveling to eat to eat food. Um so I I um I was taking the bus around the city, which was a lot of fun. Um I'm a big fan of bus people. Um uh my favorite type of person, uh weird guy on the bus. Um but uh I mean like when I was there, um I was having a great time. The panels were fun.

SPEAKER_00 19:08

Yeah, the panels were good.

SPEAKER_01 19:09

Um I I missed panels on the first day because I was um on the bus and kind of far away and I couldn't get back in time. Um and I I had like mistimed how how like long the bus would take. Um but uh the the panels on the second day were pretty fun about um uh uh diversity uh and and and disability in Monster Erotica. That was pretty fun to and and interesting to hear. I I am not like an easily sociable person, and so the the act of approaching the authors felt very intimidating to me.

SPEAKER_04 19:50

Girl, yes. Girl, yes, everyone else is like crying and having these touching moments, and I'm like, I am the biggest freak in the world. Because I'm like, I like your book.

SPEAKER_01 19:59

Yeah, like I'm gonna show up that that that is how I felt is I was like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna like approach this person. I'm gonna approach like Mallory Dunlan, and I'm gonna be like, uh, was this based in Welsh culture? And she's gonna be like freak alert, big fat weirdo alert.

SPEAKER_04 20:14

Which is crazy because like I said, everyone at here it's kind of like a little strange. And I think I don't know if it's you and me or if this is just being a human, but you get so in your head that like I'm gonna say the craziest thing.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

Yeah, I'm gonna say something and they're gonna be uh and they're gonna be like, Yeah, security, get this freak out of here.

SPEAKER_04 20:30

You know what I'd really like your information on? So this is like we said held in Baltimore.

SPEAKER_01 20:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:35

Um, I believe a lot of the organizers and a lot of the people who support are based in the area.

SPEAKER_01 20:40

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:40

Baltimore is a city that I would say I put in the same category as Memphis.

SPEAKER_02 20:45

Oh, sure.

SPEAKER_04 20:46

Where it has a pretty bad reputation if you haven't been there.

unknown 20:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:51

It can be really intimidating to people, and people are driving from across the country. Some people are coming in from Canada. I don't know if we had any Europeans this year, but I know it's an international conference. Um, so I would really love if you want to talk about Baltimore and kind of like what of the what is important to know about the city and what you think is something that people would be worried about that you are like, no, that's not even like a thing.

SPEAKER_01 21:15

Um I think I mean I think the big thing people are worried about is that like Baltimore is a uh kind of um in media, in the news, it's like a crime city. It's it's crime city. Um and I think uh that is true to some extent. Like right, like to some extent, like for sure, like yeah, like still there's crimes there.

SPEAKER_04 21:41

There's crime in all cities.

SPEAKER_01 21:42

Yes, yes, yes, precisely. Um it's kind of just like a PR thing. Baltimore's got kind of bad PR. Um like is there crime there? Yes, for sure. Should you be careful there? Yeah, probably. But like in the same way, you should probably be careful and truly all places you've ever been in your Life. Um and I think it's one of these things where people get like really in their head about the unknown, and like what like your information, your truth is based on media and and and things of that nature. And so like if all you know of Baltimore is like what just the wire and um like Fox News or whatever, um, then like yeah, you probably think it's like a kind of scary place. Um I I was on the bus, I was walking around, um I I wouldn't say I was in uh I I like definitely walked through like nicer neighborhoods, but I was also say I was in um cedier neighborhoods, or what would be perceived as seedier neighborhoods, and truly nobody spoke to me.

SPEAKER_04 22:55

I mean we do want to preface this by saying you are like a white guy.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Yes, yes, yes. I should have this is important. I'm a I'm a white person, I'm five foot ten, I'm short. Yeah, I'm uh I'm kind of chunky in the middle, I have a big round face. I have a very open face that people love to approach and talk to. Um, I the only I was like asked for money, but not in like a particularly uh concerning way.

SPEAKER_04 23:21

No, almost like in a way you find when the society's in a so social economic decline and people are suffering in a major city.

SPEAKER_01 23:27

Yeah, what it is is Baltimore is a city that has been kind of not so much abandoned.

SPEAKER_04 23:33

It's been left behind.

SPEAKER_01 23:34

Um but like infrastructurally is only recently making a any form of comeback. Um it has a s it has a subway or a metro or whatever they call it now. Um that it has two lines, I think. Um there's uh there's like an east to west line, there's like a north to south line. Um I did not go on that because I didn't need to go that far. Um I didn't need to go any further than like the bus provided. Um but I did see that they had that. Um and I'm I'm also a big fan of um like metro or subway systems. Um but I mean, yeah, at no point did I feel meaningfully unsafe.

SPEAKER_04 24:14

Yeah. We went out, I mean, I we went out to I don't know what neighborhood we went to for coffee uh the day before we left. Uh I don't think you do either.

SPEAKER_01 24:23

Uh but we were like Oh, are you talking about yeah, we were just in like northern Fed Hill.

SPEAKER_04 24:28

Yeah, we so we went to Fed Hill, we went to what is it?

SPEAKER_01 24:31

Uh Locust Point is uh for for uh crab.

SPEAKER_04 24:37

Yeah, and then was it Mount Vernon or Vernon something where the Helmond is?

SPEAKER_01 24:43

Yeah, something like that.

SPEAKER_04 24:44

There are I mean I would say another uh big big recommendation number four here.

SPEAKER_01 24:49

Uh don't be afraid to like go out and there's uh uh I mean like take take like your own precautions, like the way you take precautions when you travel, but like don't be afraid to like go in the city. The city's fun.

SPEAKER_04 25:01

Yeah, uh we're also the the convention currently, uh from what I can tell and in the future at this point in time is held at the um Hyatt Baltimore Inner Harbor, High Regency Baltimore Inner Harbor, uh, which is like a 10-minute walk from Fed Hill.

SPEAKER_01 25:14

Um which has uh the best ice cream shops. Yeah, great ice cream shops. Great ice cream shops. Go to Beamor Licks. Yep, a Moo Moo Cow. Go to Moo Mu Cow.

SPEAKER_04 25:23

Yeah, like don't be afraid to like uh leave the area. I know that there's a lot of people went to like a ramen place nearby. Great, love that. But like don't be afraid. There's also the Helmand, which I mentioned earlier, uh, which is an Afghan restaurant, which uh very tasty. Also, JC loves the lore behind it. It was started by what the former president of Iran's brother of Afghanistan's of Afghanistan's brother, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

Um it's a restaurant started by Hamid Karzai's younger brother, um, which I th I just think is kind of like a funny like turn of events. They're funny relationship to because I like I was gaining political consciousness when Hamid Karzai was president of Afghanistan. So he was like in the news. Um, so I so I was like reading about him, and and I mean like he hasn't been president of Afghanistan in like 13 years. And Khyoum Karzai, the founder of the Helmond, died like five years ago.

SPEAKER_04 26:19

But it's so good!

SPEAKER_01 26:20

It's really good. Also, get the lamb chicken fun story. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 26:25

I went to the restaurant that was started by the br the brother of the former president of Afghanistan. What a line.

SPEAKER_01 26:30

Yeah, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_04 26:31

That's a great line.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

At one point, Kayum Karzai was like the minister, he's like the minister of the interior in Afghanistan or something like that. Can you imagine you work like back of house in a restaurant and your boss is like, yeah, um, I'm gonna start interviewing for my replacements. I'm in the government of Afghanistan now.

SPEAKER_04 26:47

Amazing. And it's so good.

SPEAKER_01 26:49

It's really good. So good. Very tasty.

SPEAKER_04 26:51

Uh we went to uh LP Steamers, which is out in Locust Point.

SPEAKER_01 26:54

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 26:55

JC ate an obscene amount of crab.

SPEAKER_01 26:58

It wasn't that much crab.

SPEAKER_04 26:59

It was a lot of crab.

SPEAKER_01 27:00

I had some oysters, I had some scallops.

SPEAKER_04 27:03

Had some hush puppies.

SPEAKER_01 27:04

I had some I love hush puppies.

SPEAKER_04 27:05

Get some good southern food. Baltimore. Baltimore? Still I this is Baltimore's like the dividing line. Is Baltimore the south or the north?

SPEAKER_01 27:11

Um Baltimore's like for sure. Uh I would say for sure, like mid- solidly mid-Atlantic.

SPEAKER_04 27:16

Damn, JC's removing their southern southern uh stamp there. Um, it's a super fun city. Go out, have fun, get some good food. They're known for their crab. JC's favorite thing is he came back to the conference. He goes, you know, you see chicken bones in other cities. I said, Yeah, he goes, Here you see crab shells.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

Yeah, it was when I was walking around. Oh, that's another recommendation. Go to the um Visionary Art Museum. Um it's uh kind of kind of in uh it's I believe, yeah, I'm pretty sure it's in Fed Hill. Um Federal Hill. Uh it's very it's a very fun art museum with like relatively unknown artists, and it's all weird, it's all just like weird bullshit. Uh, and that's my shit. I love that. That's awesome.

SPEAKER_04 27:56

They had uh uh exhibit on Minotaurs while you we were at the con.

SPEAKER_01 28:01

Not that I saw.

SPEAKER_04 28:03

I lie, I'm sorry. Um so yeah, uh solid uh other recommendations.

SPEAKER_01 28:11

Um solid recommendations otherwise. Oh, this is what I was talking about. I'm sorry, I got distracted. Um yeah, I was I was walking around and um in like parks and stuff where like a lot of times in other cities you'll see like people just like eating like chicken like chicken wings on the go and they just like kind of drop the bones. Um I was seeing like shelled crabs that people were just like eating on the go and then dropping the shells.

SPEAKER_04 28:37

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 28:38

So that was pretty funny.

SPEAKER_04 28:39

It's all the Baltimore shit.

SPEAKER_01 28:40

Yeah, um did a lot of great bookstores that I went to there. Um go to Normals, uh N-O-R-M-A-L apostrophe, go to Normals. Uh it's an incredible bookstore. Um, and the uh cash, I don't know if he's the owner, uh I don't know who the owner of the store is. Um, but he was really nice and we talked for a little bit about books and stuff.

SPEAKER_04 29:01

Uh of course there's is also the city that is um John Waters, uh uh Born and Bred. Uh he's still hanging out around there. He has a bookstore you can go to, and that's where he gets his mail delivery when you're bound to see him from time to time. Um there's the aquarium, the zoo, it's a fun city.

SPEAKER_01 29:16

Yeah, go to the aquarium. That's where when I was a kid, because I grew up in uh coastal Virginia, um when I was a kid, we would do field trips, like the big long field trip was uh we we would go up 301 to Baltimore and uh go to the aquarium.

SPEAKER_04 29:35

I've been to the aquarium, it's pretty baller.

SPEAKER_01 29:38

It's pretty sick, aquarium-wise.

SPEAKER_04 29:40

Aquarium-wise, definitely, definitely good for fishes, definitely good all around.

SPEAKER_01 29:44

Uh I went to when I was um in my early twenties, I went to the aquarium with uh my then girlfriend, and um her mom paid for me to get like a backstage pass for the shark tour. Um, and the woman running that tour, it was it was definitely like a tour for children, which did make me feel uncomfortable because I was like 22. Um and I was there with like a child who was there. Like I was there, it was like a couple weeks after my birthday, and I was there with a child turning like 11.

SPEAKER_04 30:18

That's so cringe, bro.

SPEAKER_01 30:20

And so she was like, the tour was basically for him, and I was just kind of there, which is unfair. I'm also kind of the birthday boy. Um but uh she would she kept she kept saying the phrase, um, sharks are carnivores, which does mean they gotta get that meat. I was like, stop you can't say that.

SPEAKER_04 30:39

No, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 30:40

You can't say that to me or this child.

SPEAKER_04 30:42

No, she said it and she's right as hell.

SPEAKER_01 30:43

I was I was trying to figure out, I was like, does she not know that that's like a that's like not what is did she know what she's doing? And surely she must, because at one point we were looking at the sea turtle if they have I don't think they have the sea turtle anymore. Uh, but we were looking at the sea turtle they had at the Baltimore aquarium, and she was like, they're herbivores, which means they don't gotta get that meat.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

Good for her. Good for her. She knows exactly what's up. She can tell you what what animals be eaten meat and which ones don't.

SPEAKER_01 31:13

At one point we were looking at the nurse sharks, and she was talking about the relative scale sizes, and she was like, Yeah, so nurse sharks, you like you they have scales, but they have like very small scales. It's not like mermaids. And I audibly went, What the hell?

SPEAKER_04 31:27

What the hell do you mean by that?

SPEAKER_01 31:28

No, let her live. What do you mean they're not like mermaids?

SPEAKER_04 31:31

Let her live, she's cooking.

SPEAKER_01 31:32

You have famously huge scales mermaids, I guess.

SPEAKER_04 31:36

Depends. Uh uh, I know uh Emma Ham got them mermaids, and I'm sure they got that big ass scale.

SPEAKER_01 31:41

Thank you. Let's bring us back to the topic at hand.

SPEAKER_04 31:43

Bring us back to the topic at hand.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

Emma Ham was there.

SPEAKER_04 31:45

Emma Ham was there, Opal Rain was there.

SPEAKER_01 31:48

Opal Rain was there.

SPEAKER_04 31:49

Tiffany Roberts, Naomi Lynch.

SPEAKER_01 31:50

I spoke to them.

SPEAKER_04 31:51

A lot of people, big authors, small authors, I really love it, uh, and we've been talking about this a lot. A lot of the authors there are uh independent authors.

SPEAKER_00 31:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:00

I love that.

SPEAKER_00 32:01

That's pretty fun, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:02

Super fun. Um, like one of the big booths, actually, a lot of those big booths, uh, the only way to get their like books if you want to buy them like not from Amazon is through their Etsy shops.

SPEAKER_01 32:13

Oh, that's funny.

SPEAKER_04 32:14

It's so much fun. Or like their Shopify shops.

SPEAKER_01 32:17

Nice.

SPEAKER_04 32:17

They're basically running like TikTok shops for like some of the most popular Monster Erotica authors like in the world, and I really love that.

SPEAKER_01 32:24

It's pretty funny, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:26

Good for them.

SPEAKER_01 32:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:27

Um, so so yeah, uh, we got some some some good things. Uh, do you remember my recap? My recap is uh uh engage in the community.

SPEAKER_01 32:35

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 32:37

Don't be afraid to be weird.

SPEAKER_01 32:38

Be weird. They love that you're weird.

SPEAKER_04 32:41

Bring trades, have a cart.

SPEAKER_01 32:43

Gotta have fun.

SPEAKER_04 32:44

Gotta have fun. Go out in the city.

SPEAKER_01 32:46

Go to the city.

SPEAKER_04 32:47

Go to the city. Uh uh, and just like get the most out of it that you want. It's like a book con, so there's a lot of authors, but like it's also like a a social gathering of like the people that you can talk to your favorite books about. And it's a group of people who are not gonna judge you if you're like, hey, yo, I brought a giant tentacle dildo to this con to get it signed by people.

SPEAKER_03 33:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 33:12

Like they're love that. Uh there's lots of, oh, if you're like really weird about not safe for work art, be aware. Uh lots of peens, lots of poons, lots of boobies, lots of sex, lots of it's erotica. There's lots of erotica.

SPEAKER_01 33:26

Yeah, they'll be there. So it'll be there.

SPEAKER_04 33:29

It'll be there. Uh there's tattoo artists. I got a tattoo. Oh, yeah. So much fun. You're gonna spend a lot of money. Uh, just be prepared for that.

SPEAKER_01 33:37

Yeah, save up for this, maybe.

SPEAKER_04 33:38

It's a girl, yes. You're gonna spend a lot of money. I did not spend as much as some of the other people. God bless. Thank you for Chloe. Uh, but that's because I'm also like, I'll be back.

SPEAKER_01 33:46

Well, we did, but we kind of um it was it was we spent like as much as other people, but we spent on like crab.

SPEAKER_04 33:52

So yeah, that is that is it. I loved it. I had a great time. Uh, like I mentioned, I'm going to Nestfest later this year, which is in early November.

SPEAKER_01 34:01

Nestfest.

SPEAKER_04 34:01

Nestfest is the first uh Omegaverse book con. Uh also hosted by the same people who host this one at the same location.

SPEAKER_01 34:10

It'll be in Baltimore, so you can do all the stuff we talked about there too.

SPEAKER_04 34:13

Yeah. All relevant. It is slightly smaller with a number of authors, I think, just because it's getting off the ground. Monster Erotica is, of course, a huge popular one. Uh, it can be very difficult to get tickets. Um so if you want to go, that's super great. I love that. Always be prepared to fight for tickets. Last year tickets sold out in four years. The year before that, I think it was three, or four, four years.

SPEAKER_01 34:35

Four years.

SPEAKER_04 34:36

Four minutes, and before that it was three minutes.

SPEAKER_01 34:38

Nice.

SPEAKER_04 34:38

Um, so it goes really fast.

SPEAKER_01 34:39

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 34:40

Um, you know, it's a great time. Really glad I went. I'm hoping I will be able to volunteer again next year, and and I really, you know, I uh I hope to to support in any way I can because it's it's a lot of fun. And uh as I keep telling JC, uh the idea of being able to use my work skills to do something other than like further billionaires pocketbooks is super awesome. Like really loving that, really living for that.

SPEAKER_01 35:07

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_04 35:08

Um so if you can check it out. Uh if not, uh don't worry about it. But it's it's a lot of fun. I would encourage everyone to go to a book con if they can. A smaller one's a better uh book con in New York uh this year was of course insane and huge. Uh a polycon, which is in Washington, DC, is also pretty big. It depends on what you're ready for. Um, this was my first one. It was 600 people, I think, altogether, and it was it was a perfect size for me. So also think about that. If you want to go to a book con, what what size you'd be best with? Think about what type of audience.

SPEAKER_01 35:40

I'm kind of a size queen on my cons.

SPEAKER_04 35:42

You're a size con queen?

SPEAKER_01 35:43

Yeah. I'm a con size queen.

SPEAKER_04 35:45

Oh my god. Okay. Um, so that is our little bonus episode. I just really wanted to force JC to sit down and talk about it.

SPEAKER_01 35:51

I mean, like the authors are it's like really cool that they're there. I do think the attendees were probably my favorite part, and like seeing them and talking to them, even in like very brief interactions, uh uh at just like how um excited they were for this and how um enthusiastic it was. It's it's defin definitely very um infectious.

SPEAKER_04 36:13

You feel the joy of the floor? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Everyone is thrilled to be there.

SPEAKER_01 36:18

Well, because uh the conventions I've been to otherwise are like for work. Um so like people are like enthusiastic but in like a distinctly professional sense, and like they're there to talk about like social services data.

SPEAKER_04 36:30

So like fun.

SPEAKER_01 36:32

So like the conversation can only get so interesting.

SPEAKER_04 36:34

Yeah, that is not monster peen. That is not that's not giving. Um, well, that has been our Monster Erotica little bonus episode. I know it's always good to have, and it's it's helpful. I know I myself, before going, was like watching people's like blog posts to be like, what should I know? Oh, uh feel free to write everything down. Uh I went with God, how much paper did I go with? I went with the printer.

SPEAKER_01 36:58

Quite a bit, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 36:59

The map, pre-orders, uh sessions. Like, if you're a girly or a guy e or a they e, whatever. If you're a person.

SPEAKER_01 37:08

If you're a person.

SPEAKER_04 37:09

If you're a person who likes to to write down everything and organize, like, do it. No one's gonna judge you. I was out there looking like a business professional with my clipboard and my pins. Um, and and do what you need to do to feel comfy. Uh, like we've kind of been saying this whole time. This is this is not a convention where anyone's gonna look at you and judge you and think you're weird for us. They're gonna they're gonna be like, what highlighters did you use? These are my favorite. Do you need any tabs for that?

SPEAKER_01 37:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 37:36

So it's it's a great time.

SPEAKER_01 37:38

You're gonna find your flavor of person there.

SPEAKER_04 37:40

Oh yeah. You're gonna they're all there. Every type of person you could think, except for weird conservatives, are there?

SPEAKER_01 37:46

Yeah, probably not.

SPEAKER_04 37:47

Probably not weird conservatives, but you'll you'll find them if this is not a really good spot for this.

SPEAKER_01 37:53

Also, if you're a weird conservative, don't listen to this.

SPEAKER_04 37:55

Yeah, this is not for you. JC, thanks for going with me. Oh, of course. Thanks for being my book bitch. Of course.

SPEAKER_01 38:02

Uh I loved it. I had a great time. Like I s like I said, I um I you know, we as we talked about, I think, in our first episode, I love that you read.

SPEAKER_04 38:12

Um I'm literate now.

SPEAKER_01 38:14

And that you've you've been into reading. Um, and and I think it's uh a great way to to show uh of enthusiasm for like a very uh niche genre.

SPEAKER_04 38:24

Yeah, it is.

SPEAKER_01 38:30

Men suck and monsters are cool.

SPEAKER_04 38:31

Hell yeah. Why can't you be a cool monster boy?

SPEAKER_01 38:33

I can't.

SPEAKER_04 38:34

Except for that monster P.

SPEAKER_01 38:36

Oh, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 38:37

You're welcome. Okay. Well, JC, you want to give us a little sign-off?

SPEAKER_01 38:40

Alright. Have a good, y'all.

SPEAKER_04 38:42

Have a good wow.